Columns & Opinions

Student needs help navigating group

Dec 20, 2023

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently found myself in a bit of a predicament that I hope you can help me navigate. I was assigned to a group project at school, and as the deadline loomed closer, it became apparent that not everyone in the group was contributing equally. In fact, I ended up taking on the majority of the workload. While I understand that group dynamics can be challenging, I’m concerned about how this might impact my overall workload at school, my stress levels and, ultimately, the success of the project.

Dark circles arise from many issues

Dec 20, 2023

Dear Doctors: What causes dark circles under the eyes? I have always had areas of darker skin under my eyes, but as I’m getting older, it has been getting more noticeable. Could it be something to do with sleep, or with my diet?

Some holiday reading selections

Dec 20, 2023

Rummage through a used-book store and you might encounter two forbidding volumes with the anodyne title “North America.” In his autobiography, the author of those books, Anthony Trollope (1815-1882), said that this work was not worth the time needed to peruse them. “I can recommend no one to read it now in order that he may be instructed or amused,” he said.

Friends’ messy home stresses out houseguest

Dec 19, 2023

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve received an invitation to stay at a friend’s house over the holidays, but I feel uncomfortable about the living conditions. Their place tends to be messy, and I’m unsure how to handle this situation without offending them. I value our friendship, but I’m hesitant about staying in an environment that makes me uneasy. How can I navigate this situation tactfully while expressing my concerns? – Uninhabitable DEAR UNINHABITABLE: “No” is a complete sentence. Remember that. You have no obligation to stay at anyone’s home if you don’t want to, and you don’t have to explain why. You can simply thank them for the invitation and decline. If you decide to visit your friend’s town and stay with someone else, that’s fine, too. Or you may choose to stay in a hotel. As an adult, you have the right to park your body wherever you choose without feeling guilty.

Wild children are often not what they seem

Dec 19, 2023

The children were in the pew in front of me. We had not arrived early enough at my sister’s church for the Christmas Eve service to secure a seat in the back, so we were in the fourth row. The first row is never used by anyone; the second row is only for people who arrive impossibly late. The third row is, for all intents and purposes, the front row, and that’s where these two wild-looking children were.

Why free speech matters these days

Dec 19, 2023

Clark Kerr, who was fired as president of the University of California in 1967 for defending free speech on campus, had a good answer for his critics. “The University is not engaged in making ideas safe for students,” he liked to say. “It is engaged in making students safe for ideas.”